A Vivified Dialogue with Steven Cerio

Being that I’m perpetually late to the party, it really didn’t surprise me all that much when I found out that Steven Cerio was the brains (or meat and potatoes) behind Atlantic Drone. I was already a big fan of his visuals (think The Residents for only one place to start), so when the road lead to Atlantic Drone, I was more embarrassed that I hadn’t clued into the signposts (more on those below) up ahead. A dizzingly prolific talent, Cerio is some ways like an inverted Little Dutch Boy (sorry, Mr. Cerio) who prefers to take his finger out, but is keenly aware of the importance of putting your fingers in it as well. Two opposing points of view? We’ll get to that, too, along with biscuits, Rick Wakemen’s attire and the dire need for a new hand gesture.

Grab a towel to mop up spilled milk and leaking ids…free association rests stops provided along the way as the journey becomes the destination. And by all means, when you’re done, leave the seat up…

My Kingdom for a Confection :: Atlantic Drone :: A Vivified Sugar Cube Explains the Universe (2009, Circadia Records)

ma: I was going to ask ‘Who is Steven Cerio?’ I think it’s better to ask, ‘Why Steven Cerio?’

SC: Pretty deep stuff!!  Are you questioning my reality? My particle based form? You’ll have to ask the owner.

ma: “Owner?” Sounds vaguely religious…by Earth standards. Wait, spiritual is probably better…

SC: Nope nothing religious, just plain earthly stuff. I don’t do spiritual, I’m content making fun of eternity and paradise. I like being here. “Here” is the owner.

ma: So, are you admitting you are of this planet?

SC: You know of some alternative to bumblebees, grass and giraffes? I’m not interested.

Resonance ≈ Studio engineers and sound-men hate me. My drums ring because I won’t dampen with tape and all of those other knick knacks drummers invented so they don’t need to tune their drums. They don’t like hearing “when you’re done slapping duct tape all over my drumheads be sure to wrap up those guitars, they’re making ringing noises and notes.” Drums are an acoustic instrument when they’re tuned correctly. ≈ 

ma: Illustrator, animator, sculptor, printmaker, musician, teacher…like tentacles. Are you a squid or an octopus?

SC: More like a caffeinated owl ….. your crediting me with a bit too many limbs. Looks like a Jack of all trades list….you looking to insult me!!

I’m gonna take those on one at a time….I illustrated in the 90′s to stay out of cubicle and restaurant gigs in New York City. Because of that I have no horrible job stories. I got to start freelancing a year out of college and live in Brooklyn, which was a playground back then. Especially for a suburban kid.

I’ve never animated-I created characters for animation in films for The Residents and television but they were animated by animators. I hand them a disc of drawings with descriptions of possible movements and interactions and they do the magical/technical part.

Sculptor. I’m intimidated by sculpture. So I feel like I’m getting away with something when I work with clay-like I’m cheating somehow. I like that I’m able to walk away from clay and come back to it later. I rarely let myself do that with drawing. Music is far less intimidating to me only because I’ve been playing since ’74. Sculpture is still new and scary, so I’ve been leaning into it more and more over the last 5 years.

Printmaker. Something is nice about having multiples that go off into the world and have different lives. I’ve started a new series of linoleum cuts with a technique I devised to cheat time .I can get three done in the span it took me took to do one. Pulling the prints is still painful though.

Teacher. I adjunct occasionally, not full-time. Maybe one day, freelancing is exhausting.

It took me years but ‘artist’ is okay with me as a job description nowadays. I don’t sense anything sparkly or extravagant in that word which is nice. An older woman approached me at an opening. She said “my nephew is an artist too.” I asked his name to see if I knew his work. She said “You wouldn’t know his name, he’s nine.” Me and that 9-year-old have an interesting line of business to tend with each day. He gets to play on the monkey bars though, I’m not that high on the ladder yet.

Detail ≈ I’ve been trying to replace detail with big gestures. My brain is having trouble with it but I’ll keep trying. I enjoy the residue of hard labor in detail, but I enjoy the residue of hard thinking even more. ≈ 

ma: No insult intended. I’m not sure I have the chops for that…But the ‘jack of all trades’ thing appears more prevalent to me these days, in some ways. Seems people push to do it all. I wasn’t aware there was a finish line.. Maybe it’s just more complex now in the modern world rather than more complicated. Or I’m just a cranky old bastard. I’ll get back to clay in a minute…

SC: Doing too much and being interested in too much isn’t a competitive action, just  exhausting. But…I couldn’t deny that the very stereotypical American A-type exists. I think there are more opportunities out there after we all went global. You don’t have to “push” to have opportunities, you can land in them if you’re up to the challenge. I  remember a world with 3 television channels, no cable tv or internet. You had to take a class or haunt libraries to learn about art or how to change the oil on your VW. Learning has become easier and quicker to find, but so has misinformation. Now the challenge is learning to sift through it all.

So, nope, no finish line; let’s take the chequered flag out the equation, but completion would be nice even if that’s probably too much to ask. In “realms of the unreal” -a documentary about the outside artist Henry Darger- a neighbor of his recounted visiting Henry on his death-bed. He told Darger how much he liked his work, which was the first time anyone other than the artist had seen it, to which Darger replied “Well, It’s too late now,” with a pained look on his face.

ma: …and filmmaker…What’s the skinny with The Magnificent Pigtail Shadow?

SC: Shot it for almost 2 years. Took a year to write it and another year to record and mix the soundtrack. Kristin Hersh read the narration which I edited along with the score. Then I edited the film to fit the events in the narration. This is easier than it sounds ‘cuz I don’t have any actors in the film, it’s all nature shots. Took two years ‘cuz I was hiking and climbing through marshes and mountains to get the shots I needed. I steered away from Ansel Adams like landscape shots and focused on odd moments and coincidence. I shot things a year ago that I don’t recognize, which is exactly what I wanted. When I get it right I record an image of nature that because of the light or a trillion other factors seems out-of-place.

ma: All these…outgrowths…I read where you were said, in regards to your music, that “the landscape comes first, then the signposts.” Is that an across-the-board manifesto?

SC: Ornette said something almost the opposite about his approach which is what I was reacting to. Yeah, it’s my way to approach improvisation in art and music without the nihilism, clutter and overcompensation normally associated with improvising. I try to look patiently for through illusions in the overlapping, hallucinations brought on by scrutiny or exhaustion. I’m always expecting something to show up. It might not, but I try to stay focused so if it does I can get it down. That’s what makes music exciting for me, in listening and recording. I can treat it like a living thing that I have to determine whether to pet, ride or run away from.

ma: I think people who recoil, or are turned off by improvising-music, painting, etc.-are reacting more to that nihilism, the over-indulgence of self. Which is odd, because we’re selfish creatures by nature.

Sure, selfishness is an instinct. You can put everything from your orgasm to taking the bigger piece of chicken under that same umbrella. I guess nature tricked all of the greedy animals into multiplying with that whole orgasm thing, huh?

I think improvisation is at the beginning and center of anything creative. Every pop song Every page Shakespeare wrote was improvised at first. It got the bad rap of ‘nihilism’ from the traditional jazz fans who question anything not charted. They even questioned the sincerity of Miles and Coltrane.

Improvisation is a technique that develops with practice. The first lesson is that you shouldn’t play until you have an idea. If you can’t trust yourself not to overplay you have interesting questions to ask yourself.

That over indulgence you mentioned can make bad improvisation, but without over-indulgence we wouldn’t have Captain Beefheart or Henry Darger. So…

Mac & Cheese ≈ VERY sharp cheddar, elbow macaroni, soy butter and a splash of Lactaid -I’m extremely lactose intolerant. I’m half Yugoslavian and I can’t put sour cream on my pierogies. I’m half Italian and I wouldn’t eat tomato sauce until I was 12. I’m an embarrassment to my families and I’d like this to be my public apology to them. Sorry. ≈ 

ma: Chaos vs. structure, or structure out of chaos?

I don’t believe in chaos. Every leaf landed in their spot for a reason. When Coltrane did his wilder improvisations was that chaos, or a great musician opening all of the windows and doors at once? When the term chaos is used out of a scientific context I sense a bit of negativity. It supposes there is an unthinking mind involved.

I believe the idea of structure is antiquated. Because math or rules might be involved in a classical  piece or quarter tone does it make a superior structure? Or an answer in a math test? If Coltrane or a 5-year-old guitarist played a single note for 6 minutes isn’t that a composition? Whether it appeals to an audience or not plays no part in defining it. The Abstract Expressionists did away with the definition of structure years ago. After free jazz was played by Cecil Taylor and Ornette music got to be exactly what it wanted as well. I wish I could imagine how much further Coltrane would have taken it. I read an old review in Downbeat where they believed John was gonna kill jazz when he released his Impulse recordings. Freedom was going to kill an art form? He helped save it .

So to answer you finally, I’ll use my derogatory definition of chaos as a product of an inactive brain and apply it to structure defined as an antique parlor trick and call the fusion “chaotic structure” which should kill off both effectively in the world of words, to never be spoken of again except by scientists and architects.:)

Muddy ‘ol Sea :: Atlantic Drone :: Embryo Thoughts (2008, Homemade Lo-Fi Psychedelic)

ma: There seems to be a common thread in everything you’re involved with. I’m not sure I can put my finger on it, or is that the point? Maybe you just want us to put our fingers in it…

SC: I never sensed that thread until a few years ago when I noticed that my music was similar to my art and my etcetera etcetera. I wish I realized sooner, only because it’s comforting to know I’m explaining something to myself through it all. I’ve never been interested in being fully aware of why and how in anyone’s work especially my own, but I’ve never been or tried to be cryptic which is a common misconception about my stuff. A bee flying past a tree is just that. Of course in figurative art those paradoxes, relationships and false symbolisms get in the way the same way lyrics do in music.

The Atlantic Drone records are pretty to me, which is intentional. There is a sadness as well that I never meant to put there. After awhile I started seeing a similar sadness and sardonic point of view in my drawing as well. I recognize that as the residue of the multiple deaths I’ve had to bear in the last few years. Someone described Daniel Johnston’s music as the product of a leaking id, I like that. We’re all guilty of that, every day.

ma: Back to structure then and a leaking id: it’s often drilled into us you have to know the rules, the structure, before you can break them, or break it down and rebuild. Has that become antiquated as well?

No one dares use the word ‘rules’, I think it’s hidden and implied when they say ‘tradition,’ …always gives me chills.

The rest of all of that lands under technique, which is study. The “learn to put it together before you take it apart” approach is the way I went. The trick for me was to notice when it was time to get off and try my own thing. No one I learnt from or played with told me that was part of the ride. I’ve played with people who learned technique and their own idea of structure with no formal assistance. You have to learn to play with them which is a trip.

I  think the ‘definition’ of structure is antiquated. Structure is the world that music and art have to live in. You can choose to contend with it or ignore it, but it’s still in there with you.

Caterpillar ≈ Much to the screaming chagrin of my girlfriend I bring moth cocoons inside every summer and fall and keep them in a terrarium in my studio. I let them go immediately after the moth emerges. I had ten to twenty cocoons of identical size last year that all hatched within the same hour. I brought the terrarium outside to take photos then let them go. One that was a different genus stayed behind and when I came back out less than two hours later, while there was still daylight, there were what I assume were males all huddled around her, waiting for their turn. That was enough to make me believe in the power of pheromones. ≈ 

ma: Is just reaching down into the goo and yanking up something and presenting it valid? It seems to me the artist needs to put some ‘vocabulary’ to it to get it across to an outsider/fan/admirer. Then, that of course, gets into the role of the audience, their importance in the process, or lack thereof? Can you put structure on that vague set of questions?

SC: Validity is a money word…it’s a bourgeois term. Validity is plastic. If you’re a fine artist and you get a cover piece in Art Forum you’ll wake up valid. Weren’t you valid a week before that? Awards are designed to boost  business for big labels. No one’s music from a puny label is going to win a Grammy, only because independents don’t  pay into that system. Even those award ceremonies themselves are designed to make money.

If you want a BMW the audience that the large label offers is what determines validity. The modern jazz musician has to spend years sessioning and on the road for a validation that offers very little for the wallet. You ever hear that jazz euphemism “They call it “free” jazz because you never get paid to do it.” ?  It’s all out of balance forever.

As far as that “reaching into the goo” you mentioned. Many big names had their ‘goo’ validated because it was big name goo. Some of us would rather pay attention to the small name goo.

ma: How do you know when to stop? Or maybe it’s a matter of letting it go, letting it be. From the sounds to the visuals, some form of editing must be crucial to you.

SC: The music is trimmed to be exact, which is also a good way to describe how I’ve compiled and collaged my new films from hours of tape. A lot of pleasure for me in the process of congealing an idea. Recording ‘time’ in film and music has luxuries I could never have with art which is more instantaneous. A drawing kinda ‘lands’ on the paper and I accept it. A performance lands as well, but I can change where and when infinitely if I want to. When the heavy work on the second disc started I applied those same luxuries and freedoms to my painting and drawing. I began cutting, pasting and collaging paper and canvas.

As far as knowing when to stop, I have no problem recognizing the correct moment. The detail I use might convince you otherwise but I’m not compulsive, horror vacuous maybe, but I’m in there questioning every note and lyric. I enjoy being overcome with activity, which explains my addiction to the later frenetic Captain Beefheart albums. Thick melody is another pleasure I seek which explains my addiction to DeBussy and the Fripp and Eno recordings. I found a place somewhere between those two approaches I think.

Spore ≈ I took photos of more than twenty types of mushrooms in a single day this fall just before the leaves came down and buried them all. I found an Amanita Muscaria for the first time-it was a beautiful orange. No, I didn’t eat it. A week later the dumb brightly colored leaves buried them all. I’ve never liked Autumn. Probably because I grew up in some of the worst weather in the world around the Great Lakes. Fall means you aren’t going to see sunlight for months. The sky stays completely overcast – literally gray with rarely any blue peaking through. ≈ 

ma: You’ve said, “I grew up admiring musicianship, not studio trickery and machines.” Talking earlier you said you tinkered and coaxed Sugarcube for two years, mixing and overdubbing. Is there a conflict there?

No, I use real people playing music. The studio trickery I referred to was programming and sampling. When we need a sound I find a way to create it. I spent two years overdubbing and arranging A Vivified Sugar Cube Explains the Universe not automating it. I have the luxury of being able to call Dave Rick, Ben Miller, Michael DustDevil, Jim Gibson Bryan Kieser, Scott Oliver or Greg Pier to get what the track needs, but we have to overdub, none of us live close enough to each other to get together very often. If two of us can manage to get together and get something on tape to send off we’re set. That’s not trickery, its necessity.

As far as mixing goes, I use ten-dollar microphones, if I didn’t mix and eq, well…

For a psychedelic project I’m pretty hands off. Listen to the stuff the Flaming Lips are doing in the studio. Beautiful. It makes me feel lazy.

Soft Machine did overdubs…Beefheart did overdubs…I CAN DO OVERDUBS TOO MAN!!!!  How dare you ?? 

ma: Of course you can. I’ll permit it…IF I have a say in the process as an ‘end user.’…I think you approach the studio as an instrument then, not an end. Back to clay now and being intimidated slightly by sculpture…the overdubbing, the mixing, the sending and receiving, the back and forth with the music. That sounds as malleable as clay to me, and you obviously can return to it as well, and do, thankfully. You already cleared up the stopping of the process, the correct moment to let it go. Now that we’re in your head, I herby decree you are to be intimidated by sculpture no more.

Pheeew! Thanks. I’ll have to get back to you though, I think I’m enjoying the intimidation. Clay is my gray mistress!!

Echo ≈ Only Pink Floyd, Flaming Lips and Butthole Surfers know how to use it in a trippy way. It’s an abused effect. The rest of us should just stick to delay. ≈ 

ma: F. Scott Fitzgerald said, “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.”  True?

SC: The test for intelligence in animals is the ability to solve problems. Ideas, concepts…reality changes while you’re watching it, that’s a harder struggle in my mind. To deal with change and flux seems a more noble fight. Fitzgerald is talking about Yin and Yang before the West heard much at all about Eastern religion. I’ve personally never felt an exactly opposing force other than our vicious universe killing off my family and pets.

ma: You said Sugar Cube works best with headphones; you mixed it that way and prefer it that way. I know a lot of music-heads that might take issue with that. I can see, and hear, both sides of that. Did the fact that everybody walks around with buds rammed their ears factor in that? Music being mixed for cell phones, etc…

My preference is a daydream. I like to imagine all music played through a good stereo and the listener centered between the speakers. The wilder dream includes “HEAD PHONES”…big bulky beautiful headphones on the head and maybe a cup of tea in the lap. I wasn’t recommending ear buds, nothing can squeeze through them except some tinny version of some specific range of the high-end. I’ll listen to music through buds at the grocery store but not at home where my stereo and my Grado Labs headphones are. CDs took off because the frequencies are all bumped up which makes bad systems sound bearable. Any audiophile knows the knobs on a good stereo get a twisting counterclockwise when you put a CD in. But like I said, it’s a daydream, what’s most important is people listening to music

When I was a kid in the ’70′s not everyone was into music. That’s odd to think about now. Friends would ask me why I went to see bands and bought tour shirts and LPs. My college level students listen to some stuff they never would’ve come across in the ’70′s without a lot of effort on their part, which is great for them and the musicians. Music seems to have become more powerful in people’s lives from where I’m standing, even if the fidelity sucks on their phones. What bothers me though is how cover art and packaging have been diminished by downloading. I still identify with cover graphics to this day. I don’t want to imagine a world without Roger Dean, Reid Miles or Hipgnosis!!

ma: Dean, Miles, Hipgnosis, Alex Steinweiss, Jim Flora…It’d be a sad world without them. I’ll indulge you with a story in agreement if I can: an advocate of digital was over and we were consuming music. I pulled out an old copy of Hawkwind’s Space Ritual and unfolded it out to its full glory, telling him about it as I was doing it…I told him to go download that. And by that I meant just not the package, but the physical part of him being there with me, hearing that record, talking about it…Happy to say he relented. To a point.

SC: You won a determined battle with your mighty Jack Kirby-esque fist of  prog rock!! I havent had the honor to defend our glorious kingdom lately, sadly. My childhood friend comes by with his 22 year old prog loving son once a month or so and we have “Prog Day Afternoon.” We watched ELP practicing Tarkus” on DVD last week, then listened to every side of ‘YES-SONGS” – talk about gatefolds! I think it unfolds, what, 4 or 5 times?

Speaking of Yes, the one argument about prog I can recall was with my girlfriend. She had the nerve to make fun of Rick Wakeman’s silvery robe. Look, I’m not into wizardry or any of the other slurs she slung at him but….  1. He’s an incredible musician. 2. Rock and Roll is still goofier, we don’t have room for me to list the horrible tattoos, haircuts, jewelry and the drug habits we’re meant to admire. About the final results argument, she’s pretty so I let it go.

Taco ≈ I try to get to Arizona to hike as often as I can. There are little one room shacks in border towns out there that make combo plates for three bucks that I’d gladly pay twenty for here in New York. I’ve never found anything close. Seems that the traditional food that non-chefs invented all around the world are still the most popular for good reason. I can live without raspberry sorbet frozen in a balloon with nitrous oxide, but leave my shredded beef tacos alone….AND my beans and rice! ≈ 

ma: I’ve been a Yes apologist and silver robe advocate for a long time…Music consumption/delivery today: is it about enjoyment or acquisition?

SC: I have friends that build their ‘archives.” which means “I’ll listen to it one day, when I have the time in some distant future.” I can’t relax knowing I have an unopened book or unheard disc. I play music most of day while I work so I consume a lot in a day. I can’t draw with good movies on. I also go back and re-listen to stuff I disliked at first. I’ve salvaged a lot of pleasure that I might have missed out on by going back. Sometimes my ear or my head just isn’t ready or in the mood for it, but that’s not the recording’s fault.

I’m not sure if many people download entire releases anymore, do they? The days of every track on an album working together seem to be long gone , in the mainstream at least.

ma: I do. Most of the time. I’m not against singles, but the concept of an album is part of that on-going story to me. To disregard it as passé, or not relevant is…flippant.

SC: I wish Prog had a hand gesture like Metal does, ‘cuz I would do it right now!! The concept album still thrives in the underground, thankfully. Flaming Lips have been keeping the flame going too (pun intended). Is it all relevant to these times of quick bits and hurried consumption? I say, yes, because of these days of the disposable single.

I can’t tell you how many hours I spent deciphering Jon Anderson and Peter Gabriel’s lyrics as a kid with an open gatefold in my lap. It’s part of the progressive rock lifestyle….yes, I said lifestyle. Rock and Roll has distortion and skull tattoos, punk has haircuts and anarchy and we have our gatefolds and confusing time signatures.

Let’s get together on the hand gesture, Kevin.

ma: Atlantic Drone seems more of a thought process, than a band in the traditional sense. It’s your baby, but how do you see your role in Atlantic Drone? Director, ringleader, collaborator, militant overlord?

I’ll respond to all 4 titles.

Director? Probably. I’m there with the notepads.

Ringleader? Sounds circusy ….so, no, unless there’s trained elephants that I can pet.

Collaborator? Of course. I couldn’t do this alone. Wouldn’t want to. Nice to have approaches I wouldn’t and couldn’t have taken. Nice to have our mistakes too, some irreplaceable stuff happens when everyone is in a different time signature or the wrong pedal gets kicked. Spilled milk is a good friend.

Militant overlord? I am alone in a room mixing and overdubbing for years sometimes…so I guess I’m my own Militant Overlord – a lonely tyrant hacking at wav files. I’ve freelanced for 24 years- I always stay busy with something- when my girlfriend can’t get me out of my studio she says “your boss is an asshole.” Yup.

ma: Have you ever fired yourself, then? Being the boss and all…

That’s called a week off filled with terror that the work isn’t gonna get done. My boss always wins. He is the type that wants me to study geology before I kick a rock. I’m always tired but I’m never bored. I wish we could’ve done this interview in person, he hasn’t given me a day off in weeks.

ma: An overall impression I get from talking with you is that it’s all a process, a process that feeds itself, churns itself over and over. Back to the start and then back to moving forward again…So, fair is fair in all things cyclical and finding a our own moment to stop by beginning: Got a question for me?

SC: 1. Last time I was in Richmond there was a cross-dressing character that roamed your fine streets called “Dirt Woman.” Some students even did a benefit calendar for him…he still around? Tripped me out.

ma: As far as I know. My dealings with Dirt Woman haven’t gone beyond sightings and friends’ dealings…I really don’t get out that much. Or I try to blend into the sidewalk…There was a mayoral bid in’08…When I moved here everybody who I knew from here (you’d be amazed how many people I know that are from here, leave, and invariably return) talked Dirt Woman up. I guess it is a selling point. But once here, Dirt Woman makes total sense.

SC: 2. I dig your illustration work….heavy DADA influence….maybe Terry Gilliam even?

ma: Thanks for that! Gilliam was/is a huge influence on me, way beyond his art work, or animation. From Monty Python right through the masterpieces and glorious misfires on film. As far as strict visuals, as I got older and could really appreciate Python beyond the obvious knee-jerk unhinged enjoyment, I always loved how Gilliam made do with what he had. Anybody into him, or Python, knows the stories of the animation segues and him frenetically cobbling stuff together. I respect that he used what he had on hand, limited resources I assume. He made it work.  And I appreciate his cantankerousness, though I don’t know him…that might change then…I worked for a good time in newspapers so making that gel with hard editorial, was odd. At odds. I also loved that though Gilliam was/is intrinsic to Python, he was, in some ways an outsider, if only by the nature of his nationality. I know that’s crass, but…I’m fascinated by the ‘side-man.’ The brains vs. brawn and the importance of both; the Entwistle to the Townshend. The artist/musician to the responsible fan.

SC: 3.You’re an illustrator, designer, atavist, program director….do you need it more?

ma: A collective ‘it?’ I certainly need more of something…I’m not sure…I’ve been trying to simplify, strip away stuff, but I’m not doing very good at it. I haven’t decided if the modern world is more complicated or complex…Making a decision there might help. My nature is a jumbled mess, like a Gilliam ‘toon gone bad, but…Like, I adore Charley Harper: I love his simplicity, but it’s still rich. Even in his work that was leaning towards more detail or subject matter, there was a gorgeous economy to it. Jim Flora, too. I don’t mind whirlwinds and storms (preferably with lightning), but I loathe static.

SC: 4. I dig feeling spread thin with varying gigs…you?

ma: I think Fiztgerald needs to chime in…I do, and I don’t. I will admit that when I get overloaded, I retreat, collapse and then at some point I, hopefully, rise to the occasion. And I’ll freely admit that I reach the boiling point very ,very quick. I have a hard time thinking and cooling the jets, before jumping in. If I can’t solve the problem immediately, I feel I failed at some level. But it’s a difficult process for me. I think I hold opposing points of view on scads of things; it’s reconciling them that kills me. Or simply living with them. I think the world looks down on that; you’re happy or you’re not. You’re successful, or you’re not. You’re left, or you’re right. This sounds pretty damn arty and uppity, but I guess there’s a duality in me that never gets put to rest. I bet if I stopped trying it would make sense. Maybe I just love the gooey gray area in between…Like, I can start a show with something (pardon me) as ornate as Atlantic Drone and end up with Mötorhead: getting from point A to point B is the fun part. One of the nicest compliments I got about doing the show was from a listener that said even with the shows he felt were duds, he knew why I got there. Maybe it’s like Springsteen: he’s incredibly talented, really has a mission that is his own. Do I like it? Nope. Can’t stand it. But I try to keep fully aware that in those circles, his t-shirt and jeans are without a doubt the equivalent to Wakemen’s silver robes. A ‘rebellious’ punk spitting on the stage is no different from Keith Emerson sticking a dagger in his keyboard (gasp).

My honey once came into the room confounded that I could go from cranking Astral Weeks one minute and then turn around instantly and get off on Weasels Ripped My Flesh. The details vary, but the enjoyment is the same to a point. Both send chills up my spine. I may not have a backbone, but I think I have more than one spine. Thankfully they meet in one brain, or try. I guess your highs can’t be appreciated and cherished unless you have some real lows to compare them too, or define them. So, I guess in a nutshell, I do at some level enjoy being slammed and stretched, because afterwards when I sit on the couch to veg watch Brazil for the umpteenth time I can really dig the luxury of just being at home with an uncluttered mind…finding calm watching a Gilliam film. Or relax being pummeled by Sabbath’s own Kirby-esque fists.

I didn’t get far did I after all that, did I? Someone we both love said, “I know what I like.” That’s what matters. And it seems to work.

Biscuit ≈ That’s a ‘MOM’ word. I like those kinda words. My Mom used Bisquick brand flour to make them. I love that word too. She’d only make them with pot roast. I haven’t had a good one in years. I remember the last great muffin I had though. It was in Cold Spring New York in ’97. A local bakery made fresh peach yogurt muffins. I got the last one. ≈ 

…but please leave your used towels in the hamper.

All images © Steven Cerio